You may have recently been through a divorce or breakup, and you are feeling terrible. Perhaps you even have symptoms of depression, such as lack of appetite or insomnia. And, of course, you hate those tender love songs and romantic restaurants that used to be so important to the two of you.
Now you may be thinking, Was the whole thing a mistake? Sure, we had problems. Doesn't everyone? We could have worked it out. Instead, I, he or both of us acted hastily.
We threw away that special, wonderful love we used to have, instead of trying to work through our problems. Now, life apart seems painful and bizarre. You feel like half of you is missing.
You may find yourself often wondering if he still cares for you, if he still thinks of you, and what he is doing with his life. Is he dating another girl? Does he ever think of patching up the relationship, as you do? You know you cannot go on this way, with him constantly on your mind. So what the heck are you going to do?
Well, the good news is, breakups can be fixed, even if at first only one party wants to mend the relationship. To begin with, look for the signs that he is still interested in you, and yes, still loves you.
First, how is he with you when you talk on the phone or run into each other by accident? Is he cool, calm and collected? Or does he act a bit upset or startled, at a loss for words, a bit lost altogether? If his confidence and poise seem to vanish when he talks to you, it could mean you still make his heart go pitter-patter in double time. In short, he still has deep feelings for you.
Second, he tries to find excuses to talk or meet with you. If the two of you have children and are sharing custody, you will no doubt have to communicate often, to keep the kids' lives on track. Does he seem happy to talk to you?
Is he reluctant to end the meeting or conversation? If he talks about the good times you had together, he may be signaling that he still cares for you and wants to give the relationship another try. Respond at once with something positive and encouraging.
Third, when you talk to or run into your ex, he lets it be known that he is dating someone else, or is available on the dating scene. Why is he doing this, you think to yourself. Is he deliberately trying to hurt me? Well, not exactly. He is trying to make you jealous. That, of course, may mean that he still loves you. If he did not, he would not bother trying to make you jealous and so get a reaction out of you.
In general, this is a foolish tactic; it is juvenile and usually counterproductive. The other person just ends up feeling upset and angry. If you want your spouse or ex back, go get him or her. Do not date someone else, for goodness sake. There is surely enough hurt and confusion between the two of you, without adding to it. Not to mention how unfair it is to the third person, who is simply being used.
Fourth, you find that your ex is asking about you through your mutual friends. If you were together for any length of time, the two of you probably know many friends and other couples. If you occasionally hear from them that your man talks about you, or asks for news of you, that is a good sign. You are on his mind, and he likely still cares for you.
Finally, try to develop a pleasant, happy personality. This will not only help get your man back, but also help you in general, in your own life. Everyone likes to be around confident, fun people who stride through life like they are enjoying every minute.
Remember, even these kinds of folks have their fair share of problems, as you do. But they do not let the difficulties get in the way of enjoying their life. Smile, and try to keep a positive outlook. You cannot change the past; only the present and future can be changed. Attack life with some zest and optimism, and you will find your way smoother.
Don't give up hope just yet of getting your ex back. You need some fresh ideas and a plan. Watch this video to find out how to get both... click here: http://www-FixingBreakups.com
